Email- “Hey playa what about these girls? I say piece 4 sho (or at least the one on the left)!”
I’m pretty sure that the one on the right is smuggling sausage behind those crossed legs. The one in the middle looks like the dude on those bitter beer face commercials. And as far as lefty goes, the body looks like it might have a shot, but I have a suspicion you may be hiding something under that hat. Pending further evidence, I have to go 0/3.
-BRODY

BEFORE:

AFTER:

This is a seriously rare occurrence. This move is tried all over the world and is almost never successful, let alone documented. What we have here folks, is a full on, waistband-over-the-head-wedgie! Congratulations to the wedgie-giver and to the wedgie-receiver; good luck pulling your testicles out of your rectum.
-BRODY

Pretty sure the Cowboys fan went home with AIDS on his head this night. Hey Tom Hanks, those don’t look like pop-marks. Until you get checked out, I wouldn’t go around licking dude’s faces anymore. We don’t want an Africa situation getting started over here in G-Town. The HPV epidemic is already way out of control.
-BRODY

The girl who’s graduating (first person to graduate high school in the entire family) is the sister of both of these guys. She’s also the wife of one. Can you guess who? That’s right, the one in the Buckeye Tuxedo. Classy black wife-beater, tucked into Wranglers, held up by some sort of Confederate belt buckle….TOTALLY AWESOME!!! Top it off with excessive chin hair and a black cowboy hat and you’ve got formal attire.
-BRODY

Just a couple of roommates spooning on an airmattress…

Are you f**king kidding me???

-”Come on get my taint, Phillip!”
-”I will, Bruce! Stop yelling at me, I’m trying to get rid of these disgusting dingleberries first!”
-”Just get ‘em out with your teeth like you did last time”

We may have just jumped the shark with this post.
-BRODY

Email- “This girl is G-Town’s most annoying. Possibly even most pathetic. She
honestly believes she is friends with everyone, but the sad truth is, nobody
likes her (at all). She is a real headcase. I mean she definitely has more
than a couple of screws loose. She stalks whatever guy she has a crush on at
the time relentlessly…Hounding them with constant calls and surprise
visits. She will tell everyone they are dating or even getting married! I’ve
never met someone who was getting “married” as often as this chick. Not to
mention she tells every guy she sleeps with they are only the second guy
ever. She claims her daddy is loaded, and she attended Yale University. Yet,
she drives a Mazda Miata, and has worked for numerous “classy” joints such
as Hooters and ABC (Full Nude Side). However, I suppose you have no shame
when you are hanging all over nasty-ass Bill from Chillybombers. Seriously,
she needs to take that hundred and buy some decent makeup. Wet and Wild just
doesn’t seem to blend well. She should at least take some of “daddy’s money”
and get her butter-teeth fixed. (She is suffering from some severe
gingivitis. Her breath smells like butt, for the lack of a better word. Up
close she looks like she just got done eating a candy bar.) A set of
bolt-ons wouldn’t hurt either. Also, she claims to be a total badass, but I
know more than a couple of girls who have confronted her and she always runs
and calls the cops. If she was really a badass, she would know how to hold
an M-16…..P.S. That Adam Harris guy is a total D-Bag. Ugh. Does he really think you guys give a shit about his constant rants? Him and this chick should get
together. They are both annoying as hell.”

Wow…Thats, uhhh, yep…
-BRODY